Queer Babies

I don't mean to use "queer" in the slang term to mean homosexual. I mean "queer" as in weird. Babies are scary even if they're normal (in my opinion) because they're just... I don't know... they're just scary! When they're not "normal", then they're even scarier.

In this photo released by the Loyola University Health System, Rumaisa Rahman, is seen next to a hand a few weeks after she was born at the Loyola University Medical Center in Maywood, Ill. Rumaisa, whose parents came from Hyderabad, India, weighed 8.6 ounces (243.80 grams) when she was delivered Sept. 19. She is believed to be the smallest baby in the world ever to survive. (AP Photo/Loyola University Health System, HO)


Nine-month-old Milagros Cerron is carried by a doctor at the hospital in Lima, on February 1, 2005. The Peruvian baby dubbed the 'Little Mermaid' because she was born with a rare condition in which her legs are fused, will have surgery this month to try to separate them, doctors said (Pilar Olivares/Reuters).


A woman in northeastern Brazil, Francisca Ramos dos Santos, 38, gave birth to what one doctor called a "giant baby," a boy weighing 16.7 pounds.


A nurse holds an Egyptian baby named Manar Maged in a hospital in the city of Banha, 25 miles, north of Cairo Feb. 18, 2005. Egyptian doctors said they removed the second head from the girl, who was suffering from the rare birth defects in an operation on Saturday. (Reuters)


Xuan Minh, 3, looks out from his bed at the Tu Du Hospital in Ho Chi Min city on Friday March 25, 2005, suffering from what is believed to be the effects of the jungle defoliant Agent Orange, used heavily in the region by the U.S. armed forces during the Vietnam War. Vietnam celebrated the end of hostilities on April 30, 2005, marking 30 years since war in Vietnam ended. (AP Photo/Richard Vogel)


A doctor inspects a 59-day-old baby boy who was born with three arms, at a hospital in Shanghai, in east China Monday, May 29, 2006. Doctors are checking the boys physical condition before deciding whether to remove his third arm. (AP Photo)


Charikot, Dolakha, March 29 - The birth of a bizarre-looking baby in Charikot, the headquarters of Dolakha district, on Wednesday, drew a huge number of onlookers to witness the astonishing sight. The neck-less baby with its head almost totally sunk into the upper part of the body and with extraordinarily large eyeballs literally popping out of the eye-sockets, was born to Nir Bahadur Karki and Suntali Karki at the Gaurishnkar Hospital in Charikot. The bizarre baby, however, died after half an hour of its birth, Suntali, the mother, informed. It was taken to the hospital after its death.


Mother Sushma holds her daughter Lali at their residence in Saini Sunpura, 50 kilometers (31 miles) east of New Delhi, India, Tuesday, April 8, 2008. The baby with two faces, two noses, two pairs of lips and two pairs of eyes was born on March 11 in a northern Indian village, where she is doing well and is being worshipped as the reincarnation of a Hindu goddess, her father said Tuesday. (AP Photo/Gurinder Osan)

Babies and Commercials

For the first time in my life, I actually changed my mind about having kids. Well, not exactly. At the restaurant today, I saw the cutest kids I've ever seen in my entire life. They were identical twins and it was... cuteness overload. 3 years old, they belonged to the most "mismatched" couple. I would never have expected such adorable kids to have such comparably normal-looking parents. They were so cute, I almost cried... I wanted to kidnap them or just one of them. Their dad was English and their mom was Korean - they were both average-looking. Neither of them looked like supermodels or anything like that. That's why I was surprised they had such adorable kids. Just to prove I'm not biased, all of my coworkers were all over the kids. Not just the waitresses, but also the waiters. You had to see them. I wanted to take a picture, but I knew the parents would think I was a total creeper if I'd asked and maybe take the kids away from me. So I didn't.

Thus, the idea of having kids crossed my mind. If I could have kids that were that cute... if my kids looked equally cute, I think I'd have kids. The problem is, you don't have any control over genes... it's all the flip of a coin or a toss of a die. I probably don't have the right genes to have those kids... or perhaps, I do? I don't know. I think if I found a kid that was equally cute as those twins, I'd adopt it. I still don't want to have my own kids because there is no guarantee that my kids would be cute. I mean... my kid might be even a freakier freak of nature than me! Or maybe more normal. Take, for instance, a hypothetical situation. If I got pregnant with my boyfriend's kids, the kid would be 1/2 Scottish, 1/4 Swedish, 1/8 Korean, and 1/8 Mongolian. What would such a kid look like???

One thing is for sure, IF and only IF I have a kid... it MUST have a foreign accent... like these kids:


But then again...:


Either way, it's not something I worry about at the moment. If I ever change my mind about kids, I know it will be until a LONG while later (maybe 10+years later... MAYBE).

The Random Video of Today: