Dictators without Mustaches

Another long hiatus... and now I'm in Poland! But first, I wanted to respond to the last entry about mustaches and dictators. I do admit, there are dictators out there who don't have mustaches ;)


Name: Than Shwe
Years in Power: 17
Country: Myanmar (Burma)
Capital: Yangon (Rangoon)
RSF Ranking: 164 (of 169) ]
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 13 (of 177)
Basic info: This country and dictator has been getting media attention, especially upon the media coverage of the protesting Burmese monks against the military junta. Though Burma's transition into democracy was hailed by Aung San Suu Kyi's election as prime minister, Than Shwe wouldn't let things happen that way and instead, placed the Prime Minister-elect under arrest and assumed power. As with all dictatorships, media within the country is controlled and as clearly shown in the responses against the peaceful protests by the monks, any opposition to the ruling junta is suppressed.



Name: Kim Jong-Il (김정일)
Years in Power: 16
Country: Democratic People's Republic of Korea (조선민주주의인민공화국)
Capital: Pyongyang (평양)
RSF Ranking: 168 (of 169) [1 = most free, 169 = least free]
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 17 (of 177) [1 = failed state, 177 = most sustainable state]
Basic info: I think everyone knows at this point who Kim Jong-Il is. Succeeding his father, Kim Il-Sung, KJI has been just as bad, if not worse, than his father. The country is extremely impoverished and people die of starvation while the "Dear Leader" indulges in luxury goods. In the mid-1990s, a famine killed an estimated 3 million people, proclaimed one of the worst in the 20th century. Government has completely control of all forms of media and in order to further isolate the country and the people, all aid workers/organizations have been expelled from the country to keep out foreigners. There are some rumors that he died of diabetes or a combination of health problems and his double has been acting as a figurehead. No one can know for sure, but I'm surprised that no one has tried assassinating him.


Name: Islom Karimov (Ислом Абдуғаниевич Каримов)
Years in Power: 18
Country: Uzbekistan (Ўзбекистон Республикаси)
Capital: Tashkent (Тошкент)
RSF Ranking: 164 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 31 (of 177)
Basic info: Not many people know about the dictatorship in Uzbekistan, but Islom Karimov has been in power for nearly two decades now. After the breakup of the Soviet Union, Uzbekistan gained independence and along with it, a continued dictatorship under Karimov. In the last alleged election, he won with "88.1%" of the votes, quite apparently staged. Media is tightly controlled and censorship is stringent. The Uzbek regime has also been criticized by the UN and others, for human rights violations, more specifically revolving around torture of suspected criminals or defectors (i.e. boiling people alive). So, by means of controlled media, fake elections, and brutal torture methods, Islom Karimov has managed to stay in power.


Name: Muammar al-Gaddafi (معمر القذافي)
Years in Power: 40
Country: Libya (ليبيا)
Capital: Tripoli (طرابلس )
RSF Ranking: 160 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 112 (of 177)
Basic info: After a military coup d'état, overthrowing King Idris I, the alleged reason was to get rid of the monarchy and set up a republic. Unfortunately, it was an empty promise since Gaddafi has been in power since the 1969 coup and is now the 3rd longest living head of state after the death of Gabonese dictator Omar Bongo (June 8, 2009). Any opposition or negative publications, comments about the existing regime results in life imprisonment and media is controlled by the government. Torture is commonplace and as if suffering from some sort of histrionic disorder, he bases his rule on pan-Arabism/Africanism, dubbing himself the "King of Kings" of Africa.


Name: Hu Jintao (胡锦涛)
Years in Power: 6
Country: People's Republic of China (中华人民共和国)
Capital: Beijing (北京)
RSF Ranking: 163 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 57 (of 177)
Basic info: Communist in name, capitalistic in market, and dictatorial in government, China's Hu has been in power for over 6 years. Under this dictatorship, media is completely government controlled and monitored, internet (including private e-mails) is censored and there are restrictions on speech and religion. Political and/or religious defectors face going to "Reeducation through labor camps" for a few years without having a right to trial and since his accession, repression of minorities (i.e. Tibetans, Uighyrs, etc.) has greatly increased.


Name: Gurbanguly Mälikgulyýewiç Berdimuhamedow
Years in Power: 2
Country: Turkmenistan (Türkmenistan)
Capital: Ashgabat (Aşgabat)
RSF Ranking: 167 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 59 (of 177)
Basic info: Berdimuhamedow succeeded another dictator, Saparmurat Niyazov, after imprisoning the original successor, Öwezgeldi Ataýew. He might seem a tad better than Niyazov since he hasn't renamed the months of the year after himself as Niyazov did; however, nothing has really changed in Turkmenistan. Despite the country's rich natural resources, more than half the population live in poverty due to poor governance. All media, as with all dictators, is controlled by the government. Practice of religion is restricted, opposition is "illegal", and prisons teem with political prisoners.

Mustaches and Dictators

I'm sure I'm not the only one to discuss or notice this and I'm sure most of you have noticed this as well... what is up with "famous" dictators (past and present) and mustaches?

Of course, some of the most famous mustaches are those of the past and dead (thank goodness) dictators like...
Adolf Hitler (I think we all know why he is considered a dictator, right?)

Though he may have voted as the third-best Russian by Russians, Joseph Stalin is still a dictator on all levels and he, too, ported a mustache fit for a dictator.

Then we have the dictators of our Zeitgeist, still alive and kicking (well, doing worse than kicking... more like killing, oppressing, extorting, etc.) who have mustaches, among the most famous is...
Fidel Castro. No need to explain why he's a dictator, I'm sure. He doesn't just have a mustache either, but a full-on beard.

Then we have the lesser-known dictators, at least lesser-known to most Americans.
This guy's "mustache" is very small... I'm not even sure I can call it a mustache, it's almost like the one Hitler had but even narrower. It's disturbing and it looks like some kind of fungal matter growing there. In any case, why is he a dictator? Actually, I'm sure many people, even Americans, know who he is but in case you don't.
Name: Robert Gabriel Mugabe
Years in Power: 21.5
Country: Zimbabwe
Capital: Harare
RSF Ranking: 149 (of 169) [1 = most free, 169 = least free]
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 3 (of 177) [1 = failed state, 177 = most sustainable state]
Basic info: Believe it or not, but Robert Mugabe in his younger days, was an African hero fighting for independence from colonization and even spending time in prison for his activism. Though Zimbabwe is an alleged "parliamentary democracy", in reality it's a kleptocracy and all opposition members are crushed, raped, imprisoned, and possibly even killed. Who knows? Starvation is widespread, cholera infections kill hundreds if not thousands, 80% of the population is unemployed, and the nation-state is on the verge (if not already at the point) of failure. It's economy under Mugabe has been destroyed (Real GDP growth rate is estimated to be -12.6%) and nothing is being done to stop hyperinflation (inflation is 80,000,000,000%).



Al-Bashir has a sort of weird outline of a mustache/beard.
Name: Omar Hassan Ahmad al-Bashir (عمر حسن أحمد البشير)
Years in Power: 20
Country: Sudan (السودان)
Capital: Khartoum (الخرطوم)
RSF Ranking: 140 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 2 (of 177)
Basic info: In March 2009, the ICC (International Criminal Court) issued an arrest warrant for Omar al-Bashir who is charged with crimes against humanity and war crimes in contributing to the genocide in Darfur. He was charged by the ICC with "murdering, exterminating, raping, torturing, and forcibly transferring large numbers of civilians, and pillaging their property." Since 2003, the crisis at Darfur, under al-Bashir's military campaign, has lead to the expulsion of about 2.7 million people from their homes. Despite the arrest warrant and the charges against him, al-Bashir continues to keep his position as "President of Sudan", a seat he has kept since coming to power 1989 as a colonel that lead to the coup d'état and the abdication of Sadiq al-Mahdi.



This guy doesn't just have a mustache, he has a full on beard. Then again, it might just be because he's such a "devout Muslim".
Name: Ali Hoseyni Khāmene’i (علی حسینی خامنه‌ای)
Years in Power: 20
Country: Iran (ايران)
Capital: Tehran (تهران)
RSF Ranking: 166 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 49 (of 177)
Basic info: "Ayatollah" Khamenei's regime is one that openly violates human rights. Women's rights don't seem to exist and activists are often arrested, religious minorities as well as ethnic minorities can also be arrested. Iran also permits the execution of those under 18 (boys at age 15 and girls at age 9). Of course, any serious political opposition would be crushed as you may have noticed already with the riots and protests against the recent presidential election results. They say that the conservative Ahmadinejad only actually won around 12% of the votes while the more left-wing Mousavi won the rest... but hey... don't quote me on that.




A very Stalin-esque mustache is being worn by this Eritrean dictator.
Name: Isaias Afewerki
Years in Power: 16
Country: Eritrea
Capital: Asmara
RSF Ranking: 169 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 44 (of 177)
Basic info: Afewerki came to power upon Eritrea's independence from Ethiopia in 1993. Since then, he's been president and announed in May of last year (2008), that there would no longer be presidential elections or at least the next 30 or 40 years since such elections "polarize" society. Eritrea is ranked as the most oppressive in terms of free press according to Reporters sans frontières (RSF) and since 2001, there are at least a dozen journalists still under arrest in the country. All media is controlled by the government.




This guy is the known as the guy in charge of the "Last Dictatorship in Europe". Let's hope that it's really true, that it really is the last dictatorship in Europe (knock on wood).
Name: Alexander Grigoryevich Lukashenko (Аляксандр Рыгоравіч Лукашэнка)
Years in Power: 15
Country: Belarus (Беларусь)
Capital: Minsk (Менск)
RSF Ranking: 151 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 53 (of 177)
Basic info: After the fall of the Soviet Union, Belarus became an independent nation, changed their flag to white awith red centered banner, and worked toward democracy all until the election of Lukashenko in 1994 and he's been in power since. Freedom of speech is questionable at best, government controls all forms of media, including restrictions on the internet as ranked by RSF, and probably all elections are rigged to favor the reelection of Lukashenko (no matter how popular a leader may be, no one really wins with 82+% of the popular vote unless there's election fraud involved and especially after 10+ years in office) the most recent election being 2006.




A mustache and a goatee. Gross. I hate goatees. No wait, I actually just dislike facial hair in general because it seems really... not very hygienic. Who knows what kind of gross bacteria and other shit are growing in there???
Name: King Abdullah bin Abdul Aziz Al Saud (خادم الحرمين الشريفين الملك عبد الله بن عبد العزيز آل سعود)
Years in Power: 13 (de facto)
Country: Kingdom of Saudi Arabic (المملكة العربية السعودية‎)
Capital: Riyadh (الرياض)
RSF Ranking: 148 (of 169)
Failed States Index (FSI) Ranking: 84 (of 177)
Basic info: Although the U.S tries to buddy up with Saudi Arabia, it's ignoring the dictatorial government that is in place under Abdullah... all because of our dependence on Saudi oil. Thus, our government chooses to ignore the fact that Saudi Arabia is a dictatorial, repressive monarchy. Women in Saudi Arabia must have permission from male guardians to do the simplest things, including obtaining an Identification card, marrying, traveling, studying, and working. The government is allegedly trying to "reform" but the Human Rights Commission is headed solely by men and its penal code disallows defendants to question witnesses.